First off, I really love this song but the music video isn't that spectacular so use your best judgment. :)
On to the important piece.
I really believe that we're never the same. We can't ever be the same person twice. We change from day to day, and year to year. It's such a slow transformation that we don't normally notice much. But there our moments in everyone's life where you're about to make a change so huge, so significant that I think it's important to mourn the change. That's kind of how I've been feeling the last few days. I will never be the same girl again. I will be a totally new person when I get home. And not like I won't be me, but I won't. I know that doesn't make sense but it does. I'm about to go on a mission and I will never be the girl I have been for the first 19 years of my life again. I just won't. And that's okay. It's so okay. But it is hard.
I said goodbye to one of my very best friends in the whole world tonight. She's like a little sister, and I walked home from her house and cried. We will always be friends. I'm absolutely certain of that, but we will never be the friends we are right now again. Which is a great thing! Relationships revolve around growing together and apart, but it's hard. It's hard to walk away from something that's such a meaningful part of your life. So I guess in short, I will never be the Emma I have been pre-mission. And I'm kind of sad about that. But I'm also excited. Because I get to become a whole new person, someone who knows different things, and different people. And I'm thrilled. And broken. And it's okay. It's alright because change is good. As long as we remember where we've come from, and what we've gone through, change is excellent. So necessary. But just because cleaning the wound is a good thing doesn't mean it's painless.
Yes, I'm going to use music and tv references for my final blog. I wouldn't be me if I didn't. But I really do just want to say thank you so much. To everyone who has been here for me. Thank you to those who have been financially there, and for those who have been emotionally there. Thank you.
Continue to change. While I'm gone, don't be the person you are now when I come home. Become a better, more refined version of yourself. I'll have to get to know you all over again either way, and I'd rather I got to know a newer version.
But please stay the same. Don't stop being who you are, and don't stop chosing what makes you happy. And if you don't chose things that make yhou happy now, then start. For me, start living the life you deserve to lvie. Because you deserve all the joy that life could ever offer you.
So choose to be happy. Choose to change. And choose to remain the same.
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